“How Can I Not Love You” - Joy Enriquez [Anna and the King - OST]

I am a terrible, hopeless romantic and truth be told, I am not ashamed to admit it.  I am especially a sucker for unrequited love and love that could never be, having been in those situations myself.

I saw this film a long time ago and it just turns me to mush.  It’s awful because it’s not even historically correct and, I’m sure, mighty offensive to more conservative Thai’s; in fact, they weren’t even allowed to shoot in Thailand.  In addition you’ve got an American playing an English woman and a Malaysian playing a Thai king.  But I love the clothes, the cinematography and setting are just beautiful.  

I caught the tail end of the film today and repeated, at least three times, the part where the King gently takes Anna’s hand, kisses it and pulls it close to his heart while they danced.  Having been in a position where I could not have the person I love, I could so relate and was practically weeping as I watched again.  Chow Yun Fat is just…he was born with the skill to effortlessly give someone the tender look.  The one that makes you wish you were on the receiving end, knees and legs growing soft under the gaze.

Cannot touch, cannot hold
Cannot be together
Cannot love, cannot kiss
Cannot have each other

Must be strong and we must let go
Cannot say what our hearts must know

How can I not love you?
What do I tell my heart?
When do I not want you here in my arms?
How does one waltz away from all of the memories?
How do I not miss you when you are gone?

Cannot dream, cannot share
Sweet and tender moments
Cannot feel how we feel
Must pretend it’s over

Must be brave and we must go on
Must not say what we’ve known all along

How can I not love you?
What do I tell my heart?
When do I not want you here in my arms?
How does one waltz away from all of the memories?
How do I not miss you when you are gone? 

I love that not once did they kiss, though I’m sure many people were so waiting for that to happen.  The restraint was painful but beautiful, showing how strong both characters were in choosing to sacrifice their love for the King’s image, tradition and for the country, content to share a simple, brief moment.  In no way does its length diminish its value, rather it makes it even more precious and beautiful.

Of course, this is all fictional and does nothing at all to help me grow out of foolish romantic fantasies.  But who said I willingly want to grow out of this desire to have a special love story of my own?

:3